The Ding an Sich At a table in the back of the Media Res, the Founder sat with a rainbow and a unicorn. ‘Where the hell were you guys in Hamilton’, he asked. ‘I could have used you.’ ‘Dude’, the rainbow said. ‘’There’s two of us. There are how many of you?’ If he had …
When the Founder convened Dirtlease staff at a bunker in an undisclosed location recently, DEI protested that women had been underrepresented in the process of fortifying the walls. ‘Fuck off’, Operations explained. ‘The contract was awarded to the lowest bidder. Anyhow, I was drunk and the wench is dead’. ‘I am going to flee Gilead’, …
‘You remember the Meister Brau commercial where the agent tells the movie star that the studios aren’t calling back, the ex-wife has taken him to the cleaners, and the only luxury he can afford is Meister Brau’, the Founder asked Legal. He picked a large bottle of Taiwan Beer off the table and filled the …
Separated at Birth? Legal did not like the mandatory Wednesday poker games that the Founder instituted after the Bull requiring Dirtlease staff to return to the office went out. The faux swinging doors and tinny player piano music grated. He did not like the smug look on the Founder’s face or the way Marketing chattered …
Rent Control, Sex Workers, Economists and Lady Poets Read More »
A representative of DOPE visited the Founder in the bughouse recently. The Founder was wrapped in a straitjacket, sitting in his padded room, looking through the bars of the window at the Hudson. ‘It’s a lovely view’, he told DOPE. ‘I can’t see this this from my home. Do you remember the joke about Jesus …
When Legal and the Founder woke up in the drunk tank, Legal said, ‘This is worse than the time we were abducted by aliens’. ‘The first time or the second time’, the Founder asked. He didn’t like the way Legal kissed his ass, but when he looked at the large tattooed man leaning against him …
Hoeper Loses Umlaut, Land Lease Community Owners Suffer Read More »
[1] The author is indebted to Michael Perehinec for invaluable advice regarding the New York State Good Cause Eviction law. Any mistakes herein are solely the author’s. The Founder and Legal recently travelled to Oregon to consult with the Oracle at Klamath. Getting off the plane at PDX, the Founder tried to catch the eye …
The Founder recently went looking for the Leader of Spiritual Architecture for the Dirtlease Group. Spiritual Architecture is housed in an out-of-the-way office in the Bosworth Building on the main Dirtlease campus, next to Human Resources. It used to be called the Psychology Department. The name was changed during a re-branding initiative in the late …
Mike, the manager at the Dirtlease park in northern New York, recently told the Founder that Mike’s Amish neighbor had asked him if he wanted to have sex with his wife. ‘The feck you say’, the Founder said. ‘Why?’ ‘He said that they were so inbred that they needed new DNA, and he wanted me …
A bill recently proposed in the Delaware state legislature was discussed in the latest Zoom call held by the Dirt Lease executive committee. After the Founder put it up on the screen, the Brady Bunch quieted down and read. The COO moved his lips. The General Counsel frowned. HR pursed her lips and nudged …